5 jokes about cleaning - and as many rules of self-love

That would be to clean the house and click "Save" - ​​modern housewives dream. Alas, progress has not yet reached such a point. If there is no way to direct the marathon by someone else’s hands, you still have to repeat this energy-consuming ritual with an unenviable frequency - be you even a flawless “fly lady”, even a time management guru.

In order not to become discouraged, we offer a mini-attraction of positive thinking: remember 5 jokes about cleaning and turn them into a daring home manifest.

1. Protection of the rights of workers

A wise wife knows: if cleaning is less common, then its results will be much more obvious!

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Cheeky? Well yes. True? Still would! Almost every woman had ever heard something like “You’ve been at home all day - what are you tired of?” After this, I want to check the strength of the just washed pan.

Their work, girls, must be appreciated. I have a girlfriend who specifically takes business trips that she might not have to go to, as she says, for preventive purposes. The husband, having sat for a week without homemade meatballs and a hot soup, having washed the microwave and floor in a three-room apartment, does not allow himself to be recklessly reproached. There is nothing wrong with demonstrating to the household: the shirts themselves do not iron, the toilet does not clean, the dust does not disappear by magic.

2. Traffic control

After the general cleaning in the apartment it was impossible to go to the balcony. They did the cleaning on the balcony - the car did not fit into the garage.

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Common situation? By the way, crowds of Instagram coaches make money on it. After all, it’s important for a person who has been accumulating trash for years to get rid of him with a light heart - and you have to pay for it. Plyushkina Syndrome is a problem that many manage to solve only with the participation of a psychologist. Easier, you know, to prevent.

Therefore, do not store trash. It is not used on the farm, does not bring happiness. Moreover, it robs you of air - and this is not a metaphor. If a third of your room is occupied by a wall with crystal and a binder of Roman-Gazeta, these masterpieces of Soviet industry reduce the amount of air you breathe by 6-8 cubic meters. Imagine how much oxygen your lungs get, how the skin, brain and other internal organs suffer when you voluntarily lock yourself in an artificially reduced room. Are your inventory worth it?

3. Protected Emotional Heritage Sites

- I did the cleaning at home ... Does anyone need the 3D CCCP 1989 calendars?

- This is not cleaning, this is archeology 🙂

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Why again about trash? Because there is another important thought - about classification.

How to understand what to throw out of rubble on the balcony, and what to leave? It's simple: picking up any of the things that settled in your apartment, you must clearly understand why it is here. The old box from the teapot will not bring you joy, but the 3D calendar of the 89th year may well. But then the calendar should not lie in the bowels of the trash mountain, but in a beautiful “casket with memory” - along with other little things that make you smile nostalgically.

4. The right to sleep and reasonable choices

Room cleaning instructions:

1. Start writing a report.

2. Realize that it is impossible to work in such a mess.

3. Wake up after 4 hours, trying to catch the dust particles flying into your crystal-clear apartment from the window.

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We have all been familiar with this wonderful kind of procrastination since our student days. What you can’t do to not do anything.But here's an ambush - to write a report, a diploma, a term paper (or what do you have there?) Sooner or later you still have to. With this approach, it’s rather late, and even very late.

In this situation, you need to honestly talk to yourself. You are a rational organism, and therefore you must get out of an unpleasant situation with minimal stress. A person who gets up early at 3 o’clock tomorrow and easily fulfills the task that has been postponed is not a mysterious omnipotent stranger, but you are the same one, only tired and exhausted by today's energetic cleaning. Take care of yourself, beloved. All you need is to take a deep breath 5 times and start doing what you don’t want to do. After 10 minutes, paradoxically, the task will captivate you. This is how our brains work - starting the “game” and being a little drawn in, he will not want to refuse it, even if the maximum level of difficulty is set.

5. Priority projects

Looking at the tired but happy hostess, the guests did not realize that the apartment had to be cleaned for an hour to the state “sorry, that was not cleaned”.

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On the one hand, having time to clean up the arrival of guests is a success. On the other - a little sad. Why are we doing this for them, not for ourselves?

Try one day to be alone with yourself and think about what kind of space you would like to see around. It is unlikely that this is chaos from dust and stale socks. Try to turn the cleaning into meditation - thoughtfully, slowly, bring the apartment closer to the image of your thoughts. And do not forget for a minute that you are doing this for yourself. You give yourself comfort, freshness, cleanliness. You do not pursue formality, but create a place where you will feel good. Along with the discarded garbage from the house, disturbing thoughts and confusion in business depart. It’s getting better with every minute.

So, 5 bearded jokes - and 5 rules for a comfortable existence on its territory. But the conclusion, in general, is only one: harmony in the soul - this is what any household chores should lead to.